6:00 -- Hope Chornicles 60

Several months ago I was talking to a woman at my church who was doing Weight Watchers. She talked about keeping tack of points in her journal and how that helped keep her on track with her goal. But then she shared that there are days when she just plain blows it and is quite dismayed to add up her points. When this happens, she has two choices. One is to wallow in it and put herself down and totally give up for the day and eat whatever her heart desires.

The second choice is to mark a bold line in her journal and write "6:00." Six o'clock is usually when she starts her day. In writing those three numbers, she is choosing to start over, to begin her day again. No, it doesn't undue her food choices from earlier in the day. And writing 6:00 every day would really not be working the plan. But writing 6:00 periodically allows her the grace to start again.

The idea of 6:00 seems to me to be one of forgiveness. First, it is forgiveness of the self. More than simply forgiveness of the self, it is a chance to let ourselves begin again. When kids are playing or competing or whatever, you will sometimes here them say, "I get a 'do over'". Wouldn't it be nice if we had do over buttons for all the times we are mean or petty or generally mess up? 6:00, if implemented correctly, seems to me to be a means of do over. It is cleaning up the mess and beginning again.

And even our friends and family probably need to be treated with a 6:00 mindset. Again, I think it is a mindset of forgiveness.

Too often, we get through half our day in shambles and our mindset becomes, "If I can just make it through this day and start over tomorrow." But 6:00 invites us too begin again at any moment of the day: in midst of an awkward conversation, after making a poor choice, after doing something we know we shouldn't have.

God, I think, approves of 6:00. Yes, there is often fallout from poor decisions, but He gives us grace to handle them. He gives us grace -- period. While recognizing the pain our choices have caused, He takes our hand and helps us up and invites us to "begin again" if we will humble ourselves and give it all to Him.

We have hope because God never leaves us sitting in the muck of our choices. He always invites us to try again. If we are sitting in the muck, it is not God's doing but that we have decided to plant ourselves there in misery. How much better to look to God and say, "I'm ready to begin again. Can it be 6:00?" He will always say, "Yes."

Secret Choices

I was raised in an abusive homes and abuse thrives on secrecy. While I've spilled that secret, I am still very private. Lots of times, I just don't even think to tell someone something. It doesn't cross my mind because it is "private." Perhaps a better word is personal.

I worked in ministry for 11 years. Hearing students' wounds was something to keep between me and God. (Unless, of course, there was any danger.)

Add to that the fact that I have an MA in counseling. By law and ethics, that stuff is confidential.

I don't think of myself as a natural gossip. I just don't tend to repeat very many things.

Knowing all of that, I am always a bit befuddled when someone tells me, "Please don't repeat this." Generally, repeating 95% of things wouldn't cross my mind.

There is a difference between secrets and confidentiality. A secret was the abuse in my family. Confidentiality is a professional thing. But the two blend together for me at times. Today, I've decided I don't even like the idea of secrets. They cost too much. No, that doesn't mean I'm going to tell everyone everything I hear. Rather, I have felt the sting of secrets kept today in a fresh way.

I won't air it here (that would hardly be right or fair), but I found out today about a secret choice a friend made. Had I known for sure the path she was considering, I would have waved big caution flags, jumped up and down to get her attention, and possibly made nuisance out of myself for a brief time. But I would have known it was her decision and after saying my bit, I would have let the issue rest with her. The sad fact is that no one seems to have known about this huge decision she was making. Did she have opportunity to share? Yes. She chose not to.

I am beginning to believe that if something doesn't fall into the fun surprise category that secrets are dangerous things. In this case, I think she knows it is a wrong choice, possibly even dangerous, but she was bent on doing it anyway. If you don't discuss it with anyone, you won't have to deal with anyone balking at the decision. It makes it much easier to go through with what you want.

But if you have to keep it a secret, do you really believe in your heart that it is a good decision?

Have I done my share of keeping secrets? Yes. And I'm not even talking about the abuse here. I've made bad decisions and gone on making them and keeping them secrets for a long time. Honestly, the heartache they caused was exponentially worse than any satisfaction or warped pleasure that came from the decision behind the secret.

So, if you are at a crossroads and are making a decision, please seek counsel from those who are wise around you. Yes, it is still your decision, but remember the above question. If it must be done in secret, is it really a good decision? God is a God of light.

Sorry for the sermonette today, but it has weighed on my heart since early this morning.