Anxiety is my closest friend. Seriously. She keeps me up until all hours talking, perseverating. She rings me up in the midst of work, wondering when I will have more time for her, extrapolating on details that make my head spin. She meets me at the door with a pile of bills. Lest I forget, she reminds me of the 101 things that dot my list of things to do. When my attention wanders, she squeals until my eyes, mind, and heart are riveted back on her. She sets my priorities. She pushes me when I just need a moment of rest, reminding me of what might happen if things are tended to. The more insistent she is, the more attention I give her. The more attention I give her, the more insistent she is.
But I would rather have peace. I came upon this definition of peace recently:
It does not mean to be in a place
where there is no noise,
trouble or hard work.
It means to be in the midst
of those thnings and still
be calm in your heart.
So what brings you peace when the world comes crashing in? What brings you pace in the midst of trouble?
Looking at the one who holds me in His hands. Listening to the one who quiets me with His love (Zephaniah 3:17).
But if I know that, why is it so hard?
Because the world is loud with flashing lights.
Because I have so often listened to anxiety and worry that I hear them best instead of listening to the still, small voice, the whisper on the mountain that is God.
So I need to practice listening to God so that I hear him best. I need to train my ears, my eyes, my heart. I need to tune them to the one who can calm my heart in the midst of life.
Any tips on tuning into peace?