Try Again Tomorrow

Honestly, my day job is pretty dull. We deal with facts and figures and land records and such. But occasionally, something happens to spice it up. Today was one of those days. A gentleman we have dealt with before -- in situations that were equally dizzying -- came in again today. At times he has been combative enough that my boss and I have told everyone else not to engage with him, but to let us do the talking. My boss was at lunch, so it fell to me. Sigh.

He wanted to see my boss and wanted to have a document recorded. I explained the process and that it wouldn't get recorded today. He pointed out that I was talking about public documents. Yes, I was. He went on to assure me that my boss knew what this was about (I later confirmed he didn't) and that he would personally record it by hand (everything in the office is now by computer). He then told me that even though I was management that I probably wasn't privy to the information and that the document would be recorded in a secret book and that the office of the governor was watching this particular document.

I never did get to see the doc. I ended up having to have my boss call him when he got back.

Of course the staff buzzed about it afterwards and through out words like conspiracy theory and crazy! We all laughed a bit.

Yes, the irrationality of the comments and the requests make us shake our heads. However, I wonder if I could be a touch more sensitive. Maybe kind is the right word. Part way through, I think I began to dismiss him. While it is easy to do, it isn't necessarily right. No, I cannot stand for hours discussing secret books that I do not apparently have clearance for, but I can listen attentively for 15 minutes and see if there is any way I can easy his anxiety or address a valid concern.

I get a chance to try again tomorrow. Apparently he is coming in to meet with my boss. So, we will see if I can do a better job, be a bit more compassionate.

40 to 40 (Gratitude 35)

I am grateful for many of the women at P31. Renee Swope is one of them. She is kind and sweet and fun. I've enjoyed getting to know her over the past year through the blogs and then at She Speaks.

She was one of the people who so warmly greeted me this last conference. One thing I will never forget is a small kindness she showed me. I don't know if she was aware or not of how easily I feel left out. She invited me to have lunch with her. When I arrived she told me that some worship leaders were going to be joining us as well as her assistant.

Renee was primed to sit between me and the worship leaders. Suddenly she shifted to the opposite side of me. Her assistant said something to her while they were standing behind me. I don't believe it was meant for me to over hear, but I did and I was blessed. Renee explained her seating choice based on the high probability that if she sat next to the worship leaders I would be left out of the conversation. I was touched by her thoughtfulness and her desire to have me feel
included.




Renee also gave a very powerful talk that night about being in the shadow of the cross. I was moved to tears by it. As part of it we all got scriptures with a pale word behind them that you might miss if you weren't told they were there. Providentially, my word was "blessed." I tend to see the negative of things, so I don't often associate myself with that word. But as I've soaked it in these last few months I realize that I am very blessed.

When You Give Someone a Cookie

The other night I was reading Lisa Whittle's post. She always makes me think. It was about how one of her dear friends didn't like her initially. Ouch. But this woman decided to pray for her. Now, she is one of those friends that Lisa can call any time.

I had taped a show Friday night called Flashpoint. It's a new cop type show. Given that everything else is reruns, I decided to tape it. I finally got around to watching it. Here's the storyline. A man gets the page letting him know that he should rush his daughter to the hospital for a heart transplant. They get there and settled in only to find out that there was a mix up and the heart is going to someone else. The dad has been up for three days straight in a vigil over his dying daughter. The stress breaks him. He grabs a security guy's gun and takes hostages.

Of course, that is when they call in the team. I haven't watched it enough to know the names of everyone yet. But "Head Guy" goes in to negotiate with him. Others are watching him on the monitor. The dad wants the TV turned back on for his daughter. Rule #1, never give a hostage taker anything without getting something in return. So, Head Guy asks dad to ask each person if they are okay. He does this but skips the man on gurney who is slated to get the heart. Head Guy says, "What about him? Is he okay?" He encourages dad to ask him.

The rest of the team who are watching debrief this for us. It turns out that one of the tactics is to make the hostage into a person. By having dad ask the hostage if he is okay, the hostage begins to become a person rather than a means to an end.

Lisa's post fit right in with this. It made me think of work. One woman works in another office. One day when I was still very new, she came in the back door, walked to my desk, and demanded that I look something up for her. I was in the process of leaving and I was use to people going to the counter. I got really flustered and was offended by her tone. I managed to find what she needed but decided that I didn't like her at all. After she left, they explained who she was and all, but it didn't help me liking her.

A couple months ago I made my famous chocolate chip cookies. (I'm probably overly proud of them.) I took some to the office. As I was taking a short break, God prompted me to put three on a little plate and take them down to this woman. From that time forward, every time I walk by she waves. If she comes into the office, she stops to talk to me. When you give someone a cookie or a prayer or a smile, sometimes you forge a connection because you have made them human.

I've probably used this C.S. Lewis quote before, but I think it sums things up so nicely that I'll use it again.

It is a serious thing to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship or else a horror and a corruption such as you meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long, we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or the other of these destinations. It is in the light of those overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealing with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no ordinary people.

When we remember another's humanness, we treat them with more humanity. When we remember that they may have things going on in their lives that we know nothing about, we can respond with mercy and kindness. When we treat them with respect even when we might not feel respected, we give them dignity. When we offer kindness, we never know what doors God will open up.

Never Uncalled For

I have the most interesting conversations at Barnes and Noble. The other night, between waiting on customers, another bookseller and I were chatting. She had picked out a couple of cards and said, "I never know if I should get my husband's father's wife a Mother's Day card."

Without a thought, I quipped, "Kindness is never uncalled for." I've thought on that the last couple of days. I think it is true. Sometimes we worry about what is "correct" by someone's definition. (Even though we are unsure who the mysterious someone is!) So, we hesitate to do the kind thing even if it is a $2.00 card . . . .

I'm not saying that I always get it right. I don't. Sometimes I worry about how something will be received -- too much, too little, whatever.

Hearts at Home is held in March in Illinois. Some of the Proverbs 31 gals were going to be here. I had contact with one over my She Speaks registration. On a whim, I emailed her to ask if she and the two others would like to come to my house for dinner or go out the night before the conference. It took a few days to hear back. As soon as I sent it, I worried about what she must have thought. It's not like she knows me. Still, it seemed like a friendly thing to do. I went back and forth on if I should have invited at all.

But the idea of kindness never being uncalled for -- it might have quieted some of those thoughts.

They already had plans, but she said to make sure I said "Hello" during She Speaks.

When insecurity or whatever is nipping at your heels, remember that kindness is never uncalled for. I hope you'll follow your kind impulses.

Update and A Bit on the Ligher Side

Since I've asked many of you to pray over the last week about my going to NIU as a volunteer, I feel the need to update you. I'm not going. It's not for a lack of willingness, but it seems that it wasn't in God's plan at this moment. So, I have been praying today and will continue to do so. I just never heard from anyone other than the last email I posted about on Thursday. We were specifically told not to call because NIU was already inundated with phone calls about various things.

On a different note, I had a fun and encouraging day. At church this moring, we had a birthday party for EVERYONE. We were celebrating a year of doing KidStuf. I snapped lots of really cute pictures like this one of Lydia, Elena, and Grace. The thing that impresses me about many of the kids at my church is that they are so kind. I've seen it in various ways with older kids helping younger ones. And the younger ones just adore the older ones.

When I took 8 kids skating in December, they ranged in ages from 5-13. The older ones could have ignored the younger ones, but they didn't! I love to see the mix. It just so happens that the virtue this month was kindness. The parents got to brag on their children during service.

I've been getting to know Joe and Debbie and their two children. I've been in their community group and they have invited me over several times. I've invited them over a number of times, but they have never made it. (I suspect that part of it was a fear that their kiddos would destroy my house. While I don't want things destroyed, I have a pretty high tolerance level for kid messes and enjoy them -- the kids, that is.) Joe had to bow out, but Debbie, Lucas, and Raquel came for homemade soup and grilled cheese. We then made Peanut Blossoms (Hershey Kiss cookies.)

Raquel seemed to really enjoy making the cookies. She did a great job rolling the peanut butter balls in sugar. Lucas unwrapped the kisses but I think more ended up in him than on the plate for the cookies!

Even when the cookies had been baked, Lucas went for the chocolate. He then told me he wanted to share and gave me the peanut butter part. I discretely disposed of the ABC (Already Been Chewed on) cookie.

Both Lucas and Raquel were enthralled with Mali. (Katy is my shy kitty and she hid while they were here, but Mali doesn't mind company a bit.) I've been teaching Mali to do tricks like come, sit, and up. She was even willing to do up for Raquel and I finally have proof of my little one's talent. Hollywood here we come!

Have a blessed week!