Appropriate Smallness

My small group is reading The Life You've always Wanted. It is by John Ortberg and it is worth reading. Today I was reading the chapter entitled "Appropriate Smallness." It starts out talking about 3 men in Ypsalanti, Michigan that were in a psychiatric hospital and all of them suffered from the Messiah complex. They each, even when confronted with each other, believed that they were the messiah. I had to chuckle at reading it. It's a classic story of delusions of grandeur that gets told to psychology students everywhere. I actually ran into someone with this belief while working in mental health. I was there simply to assess safety. Since he wasn't a danger to himself or others, there was no choice but to let him go on his way. I knew that confronting a delusion of this proportion would only agitate him. But I was sad to see that he took this as a sign that it was appropriate to ask me to be one of his followers and write scripture.

What is the chapter about? Pride. It points to the original sin of eating the forbidden fruit as pride because they ate it so they might become like God.

The chapter goes on to discuss one of my favorite chapters in scripture -- Philippians 2. Here it points out that we often get our theology confused. We read "Who, being in very nature god, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, . . . ." and see it as God shedding who he was and putting on a different costume.

From our perspective this makes sense. But, Ortberg argues that we've got it backwards. He writes, "Jesus became a servant inspite of the fact that he was God." Being God was the cause of his making himself nothing and taking on the nature of a servant.

"When Jesus came in the form of a servant, he was not disguising who God is. He was revealing who God is."

What a wondrous thought is that? Being a servant is part of the essence of being God.

On the eve of a Presidential election, it makes me wonder which of the canidates would be presdient so that he could serve? Which one would be president so that he could wash the bruised and calloused feet of the homeless man on the street? Which one would make decisions always with the interest of the least of these in the forefront of his mind?

I don't know. Honestly, I don't think many who have the gumption to run for president have the approproate smallness servanthood requires.

Of course, the question that also needs to be asked is if I have the appropriate smallness in my day to day life?

The Danger of Grasping -- Hope Chronicles 45

"I want . . . !" Go through any retail store and you will hear this cry from a toddler and subtler versions from older children and teens. If we are honest, we recognize the same cry in our heart. It can be about things. I want what so and so has -- house, husband, kids, car . . . . Maybe it is that I want to look like _________ (fill in the most beautiful person you know). Maybe it is the intangible things like respect and honor or position.

When we get down to it and are truly honest with ourselves, there thousands of "I want . . ." statements fueling our hearts and minds. Sometimes, those "I want" statements turn into "I deserve" statements. We are mortally offended that God or someone else hasn't provided what is so deserved.

I couldn't quite figure it out. But a couple I know at church has an unusual arrangement. They are very happily married but she kept her own name when they married. No, it's not even hyphenated. When both of their children were born, they took her name. Other things in their home are off from what one would typically anticipate. He does most of the cooking and grocery shopping. After knowing them for a few months I was really curious. I started asking questions.

The last is the easiest to explain. He enjoys cooking. His schedule also allows him to get home before she does.

Why didn't she take his last name? She is Latina. If she had taken his last name, her name would not have reflected that piece of her identity at all.

But what about the kids? My friend told me that it was his idea that the kids take her name. Most fathers would want their kids to have their last name. It's not that he didn't want that. However, he looked at the greater scheme. If the kids took his last name, they might be removed from a big piece of their cultural heritage on their mother's side. He opted out of any desire to have the kids have his name so that their last name could reflect their mother's Latina heritage. Given that both children are very blond, light eyed, and fair skinned, without knowing their name and their fluency in Spanish, one would never guess their heritage.

This couple amazes me.

As I've thought about it, I've been reminded of Jesus. In Isaiah 53:2-4 says:

He grew up before him like a tender shoot, and like a root out of dry ground. He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him. He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. Like one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows, yet we considered him stricken by God, smitten by him, and afflicted.

I find that passage hard to wrap my Sunday school soaked picture soaked brain around. The pictures I always see portray an attractive man in his thirties with people thronging to him. He'll carry a lamb or have a smiling child balanced on a knee. But it says, "nothing in his appearance that we should desire him." We considered him stricken by God.

If I had my choice as God as what form in which to come, I think it would have been with beauty. Perhaps it is good that I'm not God. Even having that thought might mean that my reason for coming was bent toward worship at that moment rather than rescue of lost souls.

In those times even the death he died was considered cursed by God. Deuteronomy 21:23 says this: "you must not leave his body on the tree overnight. Be sure to bury him that same day, because anyone who is hung on a tree is under God's curse." I know the theology that Jesus had to suffer and die for our sins. But I am struck that the death he died was actually considered a cursed by God death.

Philippians 2 encourages us that our attitude should be the same of Jesus.

Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross! Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Who being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.

Grasping. Children are always grasping and reaching for something. Part of it is about growing and learning. I know that. But when the other toddler has a toy you've been ignoring and you suddenly want it -- bang them on the head and take it! As we grow, we learn to temper or hide that, but I think that I often have a grasping heart. I'm always grasping for what I do not have. I want to be just like so and so and have what they have. Not so with Jesus. Even though he was rightfully and fully God, He did not consider equality with God something to be grasped . . . . Because He did not have a grasping heart, He looked to our interests and died on the cross.

What a blessed hope there is in a God who would make himself nothing to rescue the lost. I pray that I would understand what it means to have a humble, hopeful heart rather than a grasping one.

Do Not Stop On Tracks -- Hope Chronicles 12

Do Not Stop On Tracks. I pass this sign on a daily basis. The tracks run between a tiny section of Linden Street between a set of stop lights a block or two apart. Much to my chagrin, there are trains that actually use this track when I am in a hurry to get somewhere. But please, who would be silly enough to stop on these tracks?

There is a sign, so it must have happened at some time or another some where. And it's such a short piece, if you don't judge it right with the lights, it might be easy to get hemmed in. And then, I can imagine the red and white poles going down and the lights flashing -- and the training coming. Recipe for a disaster!

Still, it seems to be human nature to ignore these kinds of signs. And children who live near train tracks, have to be told over and over, not to play on the tracks. Sometimes, it seems, that we flirt with danger.

I'm fairly law abiding. (I've never gotten a speeding ticket!) So, stopping on these tracks isn't really an issue. But, I found God asking me in the last couple of days, "So, what tracks do you stop on?" Me? Law abiding, Amy?

I recently have become acquainted with a woman, Kathy, who is new to my church. A friend had dinner with her and then told me I had to meet her because we process the entire issue of singleness in the same way. My interest peaked. However, we just got introduced 2 weeks ago and didn't have time for more than a "Hello." Then she had surgery. My friend was trying to find meals for her and I volunteered to make something, but I didn't stay when I dropped it off because she had really just gotten out of the hospital.

Monday night I made my famous chocolate chip cookies to take in for a food day today at work. (Click here for the recipe and my "secret" way of making them). I always make plenty to share, so I decided to drop some cookies off to Kathy. After all, chocolate chip cookies have medicinal purposes after something like surgery.

When I stopped in, two of Kathy's nieces were there visiting. They were just settling in to watch a movie together, so the cookies couldn't have had better timing. I was there for minutes, but I felt my heart sink as I left. I stopped on the tracks.

I have always wanted children. Barring that for the moment, I have always had this fantasy of "aunt-dom." I don't know where it came from. My mom was the youngest of 17 (7 half siblings and 10 full siblings), so I had a plethora of aunts and uncles. (Though, I would be hard pressed to name them all!) With that many siblings, that meant that there were tons of nieces and nephews. So, maybe it is hard to be super aunt to so many. So, I never had much significant contact with my aunts and uncles.

Still, in "aunt-dom" I imagined being the perfect aunt. I would go to soccer games and basketball games, plays and parties, take my nieces and nephews to McDonalds, let them stay up late, raptly listen to their stories, and be an all-around-cool kind of aunt. It hasn't worked out that way. We live to far apart and there are certain family dynamics that have made it an impossible dream. But still, I dream of it.

Walking in on Kathy and her nieces was like walking in on part of that dream. There was an easiness about it. One niece was helping with something. Kathy teased the younger of the two about what her present for her upcoming birthday might be. My heart lept-- I want a day like this with my nieces and nephews!

My heart fell because I was instantly seized with jealousy. And then, I dawdled along those tracks for the rest of the day and evening. I went to a class run by a Christian group in town. I had never really been before. It's running for 6 weeks. I got there early and found a seat. But that jealousy thing crept in. Was I the only one sitting alone?

I prayed about it this morning. God brought to mind this sign. He also brought to mind a friend's comment the other day. Jill was with me when I dropped off my meal to Kathy. We talked briefly and somehow it came up that I often spend time with Jill's children. Jill said something to the affect of not having family in town and me being an "adopted aunt" to them. God reminded me of the tough spring I had. When I was feeling a bit better, I had Austin and Kolya over. One of them said, "It's been 2 months since we spent the night!" I was astonished they had been keeping track. There couldn't have been a sweeter compliment.


How do we get off those tracks when the bars have come down and the lights are flashing? Philippians 4:8 has some good advice. "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." (NIV)


So I'm counting my blessings. My biological nieces and nephews might be far away, but God has granted me several other kids to invest in -- to go to track meets, play games, indulge in little ways, cheer on during basketball, and hopefully help mold in positive ways. And He nudged me about the class I went to as well. Did I have to sit alone or did I choose to sit alone? (Ouch!) Perhaps, next week I need to approach someone and introduce myself . . . . Perhaps I'll meet a kindred spirit or a future friend.

(Here's a picture of 3 of 8 blessings I was crazy enough to take ice skating for my birthday in December! It was my most memorable birthday.)

We all have to cross the tracks at times. That is a given. Just don't stop on the tracks. It is a sure way to lose sight of hope.

Favorite Quotes

I love quotes and verses and inspiring words. This is where I share some of those inspiring thoughts.

Enjoy!

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Fix our minds . . . .

Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable -- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy -- think about such things.

Philippians 4:8

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C.S. Lewis

"Lucy, he said, "we must not lie here for long. You have work in hand, and much time has been lost today."

"Yes, wasn't it a shame?" said Lucy. "I saw you all right. They wouldn't believe me. They're all so --"

From some where deep inside Aslan's body there came the faintest suggestion of a growl.

"I'm sorry," said Lucy, who understood some of his moods. "I didn't mean to start slanging the others. But it wasn't my fault anyway, was it?"

The Lion looked straight into her eyes.

"Oh, Aslan," said Lucy. "You don't mean it was? How could I -- I couldn't have left the others and come up to you alone, how could I?" Don't look at me like that . . . . oh well, I suppose I could. Yes, and it wouldn't have been alone, I know, not if I was with you. But what would have been the good?"

"You mean," said Lucy rather faintly, "that it would have turned out all right -- somehow? But how? Please Aslan! Am I not to know?"

"To know what would have happened child?" said Aslan. "No. Nobody is ever told that."

C.S. Lewis

Prince Caspian -- The Chronicles of Narnia

It is a serious thing to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship or else a horror and a corruption such as you meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long, we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or the other of these destinations. It is in the light of those overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealing with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no ordinary people.

C.S. Lewis

Christianity does not want us to reduce by one atom the hatred we feel for cruelty and treachery. We ought to hate them. Not one word of what we have said about them needs to be unsaid. But it does want us to hate them in the same way in which we hate things in ourselves: being sorry the man should have done such things, and hoping, if it is anyway possible, that somehow, sometime, somewhere, he can be cured and made human again.

C.S. Lewis

The good news of the Gospel is that God draws straigt lines with crooked sticks.

C.S. Lewis

If none of my earthly pleasures satisfy it, that does not prove that the universe is a fraud. Probably earthly pleasures were never meant to satisfy it, but only to arouse it, to suggest the real thing. If that is so, I must take care, on the one hand, never to despise, or be unthankful for, these earthly blessings, and on the other, never to mistake them for something else of which they are only a kind of copy, or echo, or mirage. I must keep alive in myself the desire for my true country, which I shall not find till after death; I must never let it get snowed under or turned aside; I must make it the main object of life to press on to that other country and help others do the same.

C.S. Lewis

Mere Christianity

It would be nice and fairly true, to say that "from that time forth Eustace was a different boy." To be strictly accurate, he began to be a different boy. He had relapses. There were still many days when he could be very tiresome. But most of those I shall not notice. The cure had begun.

C.S. Lewis
The Voyage of the Dawn Treader

If we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.

C.S. Lewis
The Weight of Glory

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Thoughts on our journey . . . .

It is never as important to God where you are on the journey, as it is that you are indeed on the journey. Where you are going is what matters to God, not where you happen to be at the moment. You may start with God no matter what mess your life may be at the present time.

Ben Patterson

Waiting

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Friendship

The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone else believes in him and is willing to trust him with his friendship.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

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J.I. Packer

What matters supremely, therefore, is not, in the last analysis, the fact that I know God, but the larger fact which underlies it -- the fact that He knows me. I am graven on the palms of His hands. I am never out of His mind . . . . He knows me as a friend, one who loves me; and there is no moment when His eye is off me, or His attention distracted from me, no moment, therefore, when His care falters.

. . . There is tremendous relief in knowing that His to me is utterly realistic, based at every point on a prior knowledge of the worst about me, so that no discovery now can disillusion him about me, in the way I am so often disillusioned about myself, and quench His determination to bless me.

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God's Presence

My servant, I have come into the house --

I, who know pains extremity so well.

That there can never be the need to tell

His power to make the flesh and spirit quail.

Have I not felt the scourge, the thorn, the nail?

And I, his Conqueror, am in the house.

Let not your heart be troubled, do not fear.

Why shouldst thou, child of Mine, if I am here?

My touch will heal thy songbird's broken wing

And he shall have a braver song to sing.

Amy Carmichael

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Max Lucado

Hope is not a granted wish or a favor performed; no it is far greater than that. It is a zany, unpredictable dependence on a God who loves to surprise us out of our socks and be there in the flesh to see our reaction.

Max Lucado

God Came Near

Such moments are necessary because they remind us that everything is okay. The King is still on the throne and life is still worth living. Eternal instants remind us that love is still the greatest possession and the future is nothing to fear.

Max Lucado

God Came Near

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Hope

How bizarre that we, the first to hope in Christ Jesus, should so quickly forget the majesty and power of the One we love.

Julie Ann Barnhill

Exquisite Hope

Hope is an amazing thing. It is not only something to aspire to attain, it is also something to aspire to give. Hope becomes a two-edged sword within us. Like a pendulum, it cuts in equal swaths in both directions. One swing cuts a path toward freedom and release, the other toward fulfillment, grattitude and joy. Either way . . . hope gives life.

Kim Meeder

Bridge Called Hope

Every closet, cupboard, and cranny . . . all lay bare before hope's cleansing brilliance. Its heat within our heart expands, stretching our thoughts, ideas, dreams, and beliefs beyond any boundary previously known.

Hope makes us bigger.

In every honest, balanced, and meaningful way . . . hope stretches us to a new capacity . . . a previously unkown capacity to change.

Kim Meeder

Bridge Called Hope

To hope means to be ready at every moment for that which is not yet born, and yet not become desperate if there is no birth in our lifetime.

Erich Fromm

When I was a child, I was disappointed to discover that the moon was just a giant rock that didn't even have it's own light. It seemed so large in the dark sky that there had to be more to it than that. It dawned on me tonight that there really might be more to it than that. The moon reflects the sun's light. Perhaps God placed it there in it's reflective capacity to remind us that even in the dark of night the sun is still shining.

Amy L Brooke

God's Work In Progress, 6/2/2008

Hope is hearing the music of the future before it's played. Faith is the courage to dance to it today.

Mary Felhake "Old Quarry Road"

I still believe in Hope -- mostly because there's no such place as Fingers Crossed, Arkansas.

Moly Ivins

If you lose hope, somehow you lose the vitality that keeps life moving, you lose that courage to be, that quality that helps you go on in spite of it all. and so today I still have a dream.

Martin Luther King, Jr
The Trumpet of Conscience

None who have always been free can understand the terrible fascinating power of the hope of freedom to those who are not free.

Pearl S Buck

The future belongs to those who give the next generation reason for hope.

Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

Winston Churchill

All the great spiritual leaders in history were people of hope. Abraham, Moses, Ruth, Mary, Jesus, Rumi, Gandhi, and Dorothy Day all lived with a promise in their hearts that guided them toward the future without the need to know exactly what it would look like. Let's live with hope.

Henri J. M. Nouwen

Hope is like a road in the country; there was never a road, but when many people walk on it, the road comes into existence.

Lin Yutang

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Grief & Suffering

God may not have intervened, may not have stepped in to undo what broke our hearts . . . . We may not understand why God intervened for Peter and not for James. Why some and not all? Why then and not now? All that disciples know is a point in history that gives us hope in tragedy, a point of divine intervention that spans all time: God raised Jesus from the dead.

Robbie Castleman, et al

Faith on the Edge: Daring to Follow Jesus

If they had to die, I would have loved to have known in advace, so that I could take each second spent with them and know to hold on to it, instead of assuming there would be a million more. If they had to die, I would have loved to have been there to be the last face they saw, instead of his.

June

Jodi Picoult in Change of Heart

Life has a way of pointing out, with great sweeping signs, that you are looking at the wrong things, doesn't it? It was when I started to admit to myself that I'd rather be dead that I was given a child who had to fight to stay alive.

June

Jodi Picoult in Change of Heart

"Family's not a thing, it's a place," Shay said softly. "It's where all the memories get kept."

Jodi Picoult in Change of Heart

Would you give up your vengeance against someone you hate if it meant saving someone you love?

Would you want your dreams to come true if it meant granting your enemy's dying wish?

June

Jodi Picoult in Change of Heart

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Good and Evil

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

Edmund Burke

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Lysa Terkeurst

Nothing in life is certain. Circumstances roll in and out like the ocean's tied. The unknown can sometimes seem so frightening as we ponder all the tragic possibilities that we know can and do happen to people. We catch ourselves wondering what the next page of life might hold. We can't stop or control the things that roll our way any more than we can stop the water's edge. But we can make the minute by minute choice to let our souls rest in God.

What Happens When Women Say Yes To God

I stopped thinking about the what-if's and let my soul simply say, "Okay God in this minute I choose to rest with you. I will not let my mind go to the minutes that are coming. I will simply be in this moment and face it with peace."

What Happens When Wome Say Yes To God

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Choice

One ship sails East,
And another West,
By the self-same winds that blow,
Tis the set of the sails
and not the gales,
That tells the way we go.
Like the winds of the sea
Are the waves of time,
As we journey along through life,
Tis the set of the soul,
That determines the goal,
And not the calm or the strife.

Ella Wheeler Wilcox

The single clenched fist lifted and ready,
Or the open hand held out and waiting.
Choose:
For we meet by one or the other.

Carl Sandburg

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Gary Haugen
Just Courage

And how far do I go? To be brutally honest, as far as I am safe. As far as I am in control. as far as the risks feel manageable. As far as my sphere of certain competence will take me.

And consequently in my secret most honest moments, I sense it doesn't take me very far at all. (p. 13)

One of the local staff members pegged the odds at about 3 percent -- and then added, "but with God, 3 percent can become a majority." (p. 21)

We must seek to rescue our neighbors with dedication and urgency with which we would go about trying to rescue our own family or even ourself. In a world of injustice, loving intervention on behalf of the oppressed is simple obedience to Jesus' must fundamental command to love our neighbor. (p. 75)

. . . . I'd like to be brave, but I'd also like to be safe. My heavenly Father, however, loves me deeply enough to tell me the truth. He says I can't be both brave and safe. He wants me to be clear that I have to decide -- and he wants me to choose to be brave, which means choosing not to be safe. (p. 114)

Clearly , some suffering is part of God's will. It isn't necessarily the suffering itself that is God's will, but rather following the will of God in a fallen world will generate suffering in our lives. There are two things that are always the will of God and almost always dangerous: telling the truth and loving needy people. (p. 115)

I am much more interested in telling Jesus and others what I believe, but Jesus (and the watching world) knows that what I truly believe will be maifested in what I choose to do. (p. 125)

And in presenting before us the struggle for justice, our Maker asks: Do you want to be brave, or do you want to be safe? Jesus wants us to realize that its a choice, and he wants to help us make the joyful choice. Most importantly, Jesus wants us to know that he takes care of us so well that it is actually safe to be brave. (p. 109)