Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Just a Minute and the Choices We Make

It has been an emotional roller coaster around here. (Even the cats have been fighting and I've had to separate them!) I've never been a huge fan of roller coasters and I hate the emotional ones even more than the real ones. But I've been an up and down and all around physical and emotional mess.

I called the doctor today about a bit of the physical. I knew when I called what the answer would most likely be -- stress and let us know if it continues. Right. I will do that. It's just managing the stress that is the key. Since I haven't been sleeping well for about a month my ability to manage anything is truly taxed.

I also called someone else to touch base and bolster my emotional reserves. As soon as I got them on the phone, they said, "I only have a minute . . . ." Honestly, I could have taken that two ways.

  1. She doesn't have time for me.
  2. She only has a minute and has chosen to spend that minute on me!

Somehow, even in the midst of sleep deprivation, I'm choosing the second. It feels significantly better than the first. And given my history with her, it is probably the more accurate of the two. I know she would have given me more than a minute if she had the time and that is where her heart lies.

It did get me thinking some about the choices we make. Sometimes we just feel badly because we just feel badly. That is all there is to it. Other times we exacerbate it by the choices we make. Can you see in my example how one would have made things worse? And it is far from who this person is.

I still feel blah and out of sorts and overly tired and have a headache and all, . . . . but in making that mental choice I feel cared for rather than abandoned. That, my friends, is huge.

Is there a place in your life where there is a choice to be made in how you see something?


Renee Swope said...

Great insight Amy. Wow, what a powerful choice to look at your friend's statement in two totally different ways. I want to learn how to do that more often. You definitely made an amazing choice to believe the best about her and about you! Powerful!

I know you are feeling bluesy and blah and topsy turvy emotionally. I want you to know that I am praying for you. Praying that God will give you His perspective when others do or say things that could really hurt and make you feel unimportant. I know that you are a precious friend to many women. You are making a huge difference in so many lives through your blog and I bet in everyday life, too.

Just wanted to send you a big cyber hug!!!


Heather said...

I have a choice to make in a close relationship. Do I believe that a person very close to me is hurting me, and not doing what I need because they are purposeful in that? Or do i choose to believe that they really don't know any other way to act, and don't know even that they are hurting me? Right now, i am working on choosing to believe the latter. If they really don't know they are hurting me, they can't make the change. and even if i tell them they are hurting me, they don't have the skills or ability to make the changes I need.
So I work on what I can do for me. I change me, and hopefully God will change them. As long as I know it isn't purposeful, and that my identity comes through Christ not this other person, I am OK.
Thank you for your insight. It really made me think!
God bless you,

Anonymous said...

I recently read that stress comes from things not going the way we planned. I don't know if that helps anyone else, but, maybe because i am a planner, it really helped me. When i begin feeling that choking stress feeling i have been asking myself what plans are not going "my way". Have i made unrealistic expectations of myself or others?

Amy, i enjoy your site. I found you from PROV 31.

blessing, Diane

Heather@Mommymonk said...

Sorry you're having an up and down time of it recently. I am too.

I find it too easy to choose the wrong thought pattern. If a friend only has a minute, then I am not worth much to that person. I want to choose to think differently next time. And not let Satan's little remarks get me in over my head.

Samantha said...

Amy - Stopped by from the Say Yes group :)

Great, great post. Good for you, for choosing the second :D

As someone who also suffers from bouts of the blues, I'll be sending up a prayer for ya.

Cheer and Blessings,

Laura said...

I am so sorry you are having a hard time. I hope you are feeling better soon. I will pray for you sweet friend.