Saturday, December 6, 2008

Unsettled.

It has been a very busy week and a very busy weekend. As I head into Sunday, I just feel tired. It wasn't anything specific. It was just a number of odds and ends.

Maybe it was that I had a 5 day weekend over Thanksgiving from my primary job. (I still worked at the bookstore a couple of days.) I could get use to two day weeks. Mabye it was the cold and the snow. Maybe it is the holidays creeping up and figuring out all the finances. Maybe it is wanting to give abundantly but knowing that resources are limited. Maybe it is turning 40 in a week. Mabye it was keeping up with/track of two teens this weekend. Though in all fairness, today went fairly smoothly. But they wanted to go to the mall. What was I thinking on a Saturday before Christmas to say, "Yes" to this request? I hate the mall on any given normal day.

Maybe it is a situation that needed to be put on the back burner for a week or two.

Whatever it is, I am not feeling emotionally, spiritually ready for Sunday. There is no quietness in my soul. In fact, if I felt like I had the option I would like to skip tomorrow and stay curled in bed. Oh, but then there are the boys. I'm still on duty. That wouldn't be a great example to set.

But, I'm just feeling our of sorts and unsure. I don't feel at all prepared to walk into worship.

So, if you are up late or early, please say a prayer for my Sunday -- that my heart would be focused on God.





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1 comment:

hkudla said...

Dear Amy,
It is 11:40pm. I got your post just before I was about to head to bed.
Know that I will be praying for you. I too am feeling unsettled and not ready for church tomorrow.
Please pray for me if you get the chance. I am struggling with a lot of grief over ending counseling... well, joy at ending counseling, but grief and ending the relationship with Tricia. I will miss her.
I warned Dave that i was probably going to cry all through church tomorrow... so that if I don't have enough Kleenex, he will be prepared.
I am going to head to bed now, as Dave just got home from work and needs to unwind... and probably cry myself to sleep... at least it will help release some of the tension... and hopefully help through the grieving process...
Thank you so much for the opportunity to pray for you. Please know i will...
God bless you,
Heather