I like my air conditioner in the summer and my heavy down comforter in the winter. I like my clothes clean, a shower every morning, and knowing that if I'm hungry there is always food available. I like to be comfortable. I like to be satisfied.
But lately I've been thinking that there is a danger to being comfortable: to being too satisfied. That sense of comfort, that sense of satisfaction whispers to us to be content--that this is all there is.
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Though it has been numerous years, I confess, once or twice I've given in to playing the lottery. Typically, it is when it reaches some astronomical number and every one at work chips into buy a few tickets. While I know it is essentially throwing that money away, it is tempting to think of what I might do with that money -- both the good and some of the luxuries I might enjoy.
But, I know I really would be a fool if I bought a ticket and then started living like I had the money in hand already.
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Loose ends drive me bonkers. Anyone at work can tell you, I'm constantly running around tying up the loose ends. If my loose ends are securely anchored, I'll worry about yours. But the loose ends I can least tolerate are the relational ones. If I don't get relational closure, I obsess. Being a pessimist, my issue is always what it is about me that made you leave.
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Have you ever said, "I could never do _______?" Maybe it is speak in front of a large crowd. Maybe it is run a mile, let alone a marathon. Maybe it is write a book or learn to dance.
Or have you ever looked at someone else's circumstances with cancer or a drug addicted child or a marital affair and said, "I could never handle that."
With either scenario, we look at the impossibilities. We see all the reasons why we could never pack up and do missions work in Africa. We see reasons why we could never handle a special needs child.We are (at least I am) plagued by impossibility.
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A while back I invested in some trinkets. One is gold and silver. The other is black and white. They have dangles and make faint jingling sounds. The best part about them is that they are lovingly inscribed -- name and phone number.
However, my cats are less than thrilled with said trinkets -- especially since they went around their necks. Yes, I've had my cats for a while but they've never worn collars. My rationale has been that they are indoor cats so they really didn't need them. Still, there was that one time Mali darted out on the deck.
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I'm not much for New Year's Resolutions, however, I am fond of this older song by Carolyn Arends. I've put the words below for you. What if we did live our lives like every day was New Year's day instead of like our problems and failures defined us? I confess to believe in a God of second chances (and third and fourth), but what if I lived that way? It really might start a revolution if I extended grace to myself and those around me.
New Year's Day
I buy a lot of diaries
Fill them full of good intentions
Each and every New Year's Eve
I make myself a list
All the things I'm gonna change
Until January 2nd
So this this time I am making one more list
This will be my resolution
Every day is new year's day
This could start a revolution
Every day is new year's day
I believe it's possible
I believe in new beginnings
I believe in Christmas day
And Easter morning to0
I believe it's doable
Because I believe in second chances
Just the way I believe in you
This will be my resolution
Every day is new year's day
This could start a revolution
Every day is new year's day
One more chance to start all over
One more chance to change and grow
One more chance to grab a hold of faith
And never let it go
This will be my resolution
Every day is new year's day
This could start a revolution
Every day is new year's day
Here's to living this year like I belong to the God of second chances.
Recently, I listened to a co-worker talk about an event he had helped with. He assisted with the meet-and-greet portion of the event and was thrilled when he kept it running on time. He explained that the most people wanted a word or longer with the celebrity but he had them ushered out the moment their picture was snapped.
Except for the important people, that is. These he ushered up to the celebrity and stated who they were, noting their prominence. While they weren't given a great length of time, they were given time where the average person was not.
Honestly, part of me bristled at this. What made these people more important, that they deserved a conversation rather than just a flash of a camera? True, events are things that need to be kept on schedule. But I hate it that we live in a world where money and power and fame denote importance that the average person is not likely to achieve.
I have a job and half.
My part time job is at one of the bookstores in town. You may have noticed that e-readers (electronic hand held readers) are multiplying. My managers have discovered that I have knack for promoting ours. I'm not sure how that happened or why as my approach is generally a soft sell. But it is what it is.
My store is really promoting that one of the things that sets us apart is US! We will completely set up the device before you leave the store so you walk out reading. We also encourage people to ask questions. We want it to be a great purchase.
The odd thing is that I am becoming a "techie" in terms of our device. Seriously. I've never considered myself one in the past and I'm still getting used to this strange idea. Most technical "expertise" in my life is pure luck.
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In 1996 I had been on staff with InterVarsity Christian Fellowship (IVCF) for five years at Indiana University. I still loved working with students, but I felt the tug to venture somewhere else. I began looking for the possibility of transferring with IVCF to another school. The possibility of moving to Illinois came about. I had thought that I would move in 1997, but the team leader in Illinois was interested in me moving so that I would be in place the fall of 1996.
I decided to move. However, my summer was booked with camps and various things so that making a trip to Bloomington Normal was next to impossible. I had talked to another staff, Marcia Wang, and we had decided we would room together. She found a place. In August I moved to a new city without ever having visited. My adventurous thought was that if I were moving to Africa as a missionary I might never have done a preliminary visit either.
While it worked out well, I sometimes marvel at my willingness to go sight unseen. Perhaps, I am more cautious the older I get or I rely on the conventional wisdom of look before you leap.
As I've thought about it, it has come to mind that sometimes God says "Go" without laying out the entire plan. I want an itinerary. We will make the following stops. The trip will take so many days, etc. But looking at scripture, it seems that God often does not lay out every step. When he called Abram/Abraham to leave his home it was only with the statement that he was to go to a land that God would show him. It seems too vague me. Or when the early Christians were spreading the good news, it seems that they were often lucky to know the next step. Sometimes, like for Paul, that came in a dream.
It isn't just with traveling that God sometimes gives the instruction and possibly a long term end point but leaves out the middle.
Again, God promised Abraham that he would make him into a great nation. Abraham had to wait many years for the promised son. My logic says that Abraham and Sarah would have multiplied like the Duggars of 19 Kids and Counting. But Abraham's line didn't really start multiply until his 12 great grandkids. And in hindsight, it seems that Abraham's biological kids weren't really what God meant. Yes, God used Abraham's descendants to spread His word, but in many respects, it seems that Abraham's offspring that outnumber the stars are really faith descendants.
A few years ago, I felt God prompting me to leave my job and start a private practice in counseling. It was risky and nerve racking. Honestly, it didn't turn out at all like I expected. Within a year, I had closed what I had just opened. Did it turn out like I expected? No. Do I still think God wanted me to do it? Yes.
I had been working as a social worker in foster care. The job was exhausting. I sometimes worked all day and then supervised parent child visits in the evening. It didn't leave me much time for anything else.
About the time that I found office space and had my last day, I met Bill. Bill worked third shift at the local paper. We ended up spending some time together on just about a daily basis. That wouldn't have been at all possible with my work schedule as a foster care social worker and his third shift job. I thought that the practice was the goal. In hindsight I think that giving me that time with Bill was the goal. (Bill died suddenly in late April of that year.)
I like knowing the steps in a journey. But I am learning that with God it is more about trusting the one who says "Move" or "Stop" or "Turn" or "Rest" or any number of directions.
In traveling we might say, "Have passport, will travel."
With God we must be willing to give up our preconceived notions and perhaps we should say, "Have faith, will follow."
God's work in progress,
Amy
For some reason, my favorite Bible characters have been on my mind as of late. They include Josiah and Peter and Esther to name just a few. I've found myself perusing the stories of these characters and those like them. As I've been doing that, I've felt this question tingle at the edges of my mind. I've kind of wanted to keep it at the edges, but as it sometimes happens, God wanted me to look at it. What is the question you ask?
Great characters of the faith fill the pages of the Bible, which one are you most like?
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Reprinted from September 2009.
I am an optimist when it comes to other people. While I wish it wasn't so, I tend toward negative thinking when it comes to myself. This is what I tell myself:
At some point in my elementary school days, my parents carpeted the basement and it became a depository of toys. Like most kids, the toys were fun, but some of the best times to be had just required an imagination. There were a couple window wells, but really, the basement was fairly dark. We discovered that playing Hide-N-Seek in the dark was better than regular Hide-N-Seek. If the cousins were visiting, this was a great pass time.
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I don't know what my parents were thinking when they named me. I do know that they chose my twin's and my middle names by naming us each after a grandmother. But my parents never talked about why they named me "Amy."
When I was in junior high, I discovered that Amy means "beloved." I was actually pretty disillusioned about that because I felt anything but loved and it seemed either simple irony or some cruel joke for that to be the meaning behind my name.
But over the last several years as my roots have deepened in relation to God and through the care of others, I don't think that of my name that way anymore. I believe God is the one who prompted my parents to name me "Amy" and that He has gently whispered through my name "BE LOVED" over all these years. I'm just beginning to grasp the significance of that.
My church has just purchased a new facility (new to us that is). Actually, we've purchased more than that. We've purchased a piece of history. Parts of the building are 97 years old. A church has been meeting there all of those years. Those are prayer soaked, worship filled walls.
Today, we had a first/last service with the members of the congregation we are purchasing it from. They called it a "baton" handing service. It was a bit of an emotional service as they said goodbye to a place filled with memories, hopes, and dreams and we said hello to a new area of ministry. They prayed many years ago for the parking lot to overflow. Today it did. We were forewarned that we would be parking on the street and walking. (It was a lovely day for a short walk.) I know that it looked differently than they anticipated, so that makes it bittersweet.
It will be different for us -- going from a mutlipurpose warehouse with 2 bathrooms (yes, lots of standing in line) to a bigger building with 27 bathrooms, a balcony, lots of beautiful old wood, a wing of classrooms for the kids, . . . The biggest change will probably be being in a neighborhood instead of off the highway going out of town. There are lots of ministry opportunities there.
It was a bit of coming around for me. My parents were not overly religious but we belonged to a United Methodist Church. I was baptized as an infant. While I don't know that my parents were faithful to the promises made that day, I do know that God was. We went on Christmas and Easter and a few other times. The Sunday they were giving third graders Bibles, we "happened" to go. I remember it distinctly as it was the first time I had held a Bible. And since I loved reading, it seemed like a challenge -- a book that had to be read.
Several years later, we were told we needed to go to confirmation class. My parents took my twin and I and dropped us off. Over a couple of weeks, we found we enjoyed the nursery and soon we were going to youth group as well. One night after a Sunday school lesson earlier that day had talked about giving your life to Christ, I prayed and did just that.
While I've gong to various denominations since, I guess my roots are United Methodist. While we are not a United Methodist congregation, it is interesting to find myself back in a building with those roots as well.
We officially have the keys, but won't have a grand reopening until September. There is lots of work to be done until then.
I'm thankful for all the faithful people who have been in that building before us. As that old Steve Green song says, "May all who come behind us find us faithful."
It's Yes to God day at Lelia's. Here are my thoughts on chapter 7, "Keeping Our Vision Clear."
I've been blessed with remarkably good vision. As soon as I write that, I'll probably start needing glasses! Aside from a slight astigmatism in 1 eye, I see fine. Honestly, at this point in my life, there is zero impact from it.
Though about 15 years ago was a different story. It was right after my mother had passed away and I was stressed. That spring the year and half of her illness and passing caught up with me. I had headaches and my vision blurred. It was just hard to focus.
I knew I had the astigmatism before but I had never needed any help. The doctor told me (at 23) that I wasn't as young as I use to be and that sometimes it made it harder for the eyes to adjust quickly enough, that my other eye was somehow through compensating. Happily, it eventually righted itself but I am waiting -- at 39 -- for the problems to come back with age!
While most people aren't as lucky as I was to have my vision "recorrect," I think there are times when we all have things get out of focus. And there are choices we can make to get back in focus. I love Lysa's perspective on the fact that while we are often nearsighted God's vision for us is always clear.
As I think about it, His vision of our past is perfect. His vision of our future is perfect. His vision of where we are at any given moment is also perfect. But sometimes -- often -- I argue with Him about all three. Why did this have to have happened growing up? Why couldn't I be like so and so who has had a friend since she was four? Why did you let me make that bad choice? How will things ever work out in the future? What is the future going to hold? It's paralyzing to think about. How will I manage today?
Lysa shares with us a story about some unexpected money they received and how she was set on new curtains. The short version is that it took God working on her heart to make her allow Art to make the decision not to get those curtains give the money away. Many years later, if things went the way they have, the curtains would have needed to be discarded.
God knew what Lysa wanted today wasn't what she would need for her tomorrow. The same is true for me. God knows what tomorrow brings and how to prepare me for it. The hard part is trusting Him with it all.
Lysa also points to the fact that God is busy in the everyday things of life. There really is no happenstance with God. I heard a quote once that said that "Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous." I use to like that quote, thought it was clever. Maybe, to a degree, it is. But it really is only coincidence to those who don't know God. Christians (though we may have to ask Him to show us) can see God's hand in all the things of life -- including the mundane. In fact, He is probably more likely to consistently meet us there than in those rare mountaintop experiences.
Lysa shares three things from the story of Jesus calling Peter:
My conclusion, we all aspire to the great things, but more often God is calling us to obey and listen through the mundane things of life -- the lawn, the dishes, the groceries, the kind word, the helping hand, . . . . Since God is in the midst of them, maybe they aren't so mundane!
One of my favorite books is called My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult. Actually, I like many of the books that she writes. But the last one, 19 Seconds, was disturbing. It was about a fictionalized school shooting. The week after I read it the Virginia Tech shootings happened. I like her writing because of her ability to put me inside a character's head and heart.
My Sister's Keeper is about a 13-year-old girl, Anna, who sues her parents for the rights to her own body. She wants medical emancipation and to be the person who decides if she will donate a kidney to her dying sister, Kate. Anna was conceived specifically to be a matched donor for her sister. Her entire life has been lived in the shadow of her sister's illness. In the book you hear from Anna, her parents, the lawyers, and her brother.
I wanted to share an excerpt from Anna (p.299).
When you are a kid you have your own language, and unlike French or Spanish or whatever you start learning in the fourth grade, this one you're born with , and eventually lose. Everyone under the age of seven is fluent in Ifspeak; go hang around with someone under three feet tall and you'll see. What if a giant funnelweb spider crawled out of that hole over your head and bit you on the neck? What if the only antidote for venom was locked up in a vault on the top of a mountain? What if you lived through the bite, but could only move you eyelids and blink out an alphabet? It doesn't really matter how far you go; the point is that it's a world of possibility. Kids think with their brains cracked wide open; becoming an adult, I've decided, is only a slow sewing shut.
I think she is right. On one hand, outgrowing Ifspeak is functional. If your ifspeak is only related to negative things, then it could cause a great deal of anxiety. On the other hand, out growing ifspeak limits us.
For kids, anything is a possibility. They dream BIG. When I was a kid I was going to be a dolphinologist (not that there is such a thing), keep the dolphins in a pool outback, have six kids, and the kids would daily help with the dolphins. By studying the interaction of my kids and the dolphins, I would break the barrier to intelligently communicating with these remarkable animals and win lots of awards. That was my primary dream. I also considered becoming the first female president.
As we grow up, reality slowly sets in. They just don't let people keep dolphins in a pool outback. We find we are limited by our rules and regulations, finances, intellect, abilities or lack of abilities, circumstances, . . . .
As I was thinking about this quote, I wondered if we are also often limited by our faith. Yes, you read that right. Sometimes we are limited by the things we put our faith in -- other people, our abilities, whatever. Where we need to put our faith is in God. With God all things are possible. There are no limits. The one who created the universe can overcome every obstacle. But sometimes we don't let Him. Sometimes we don't even ask or if we do ask it is halfheartedly, not really believing . . . . That's not to say that God always says, "Yes." But I do think we put limits on God.
Sometimes when I pray, I pray very specifically. If God doesn't answer directly with my proposal, I think He hasn't answered. Maybe He has but the answer is packaged differently than I anticipated.
Ifspeak. I think it is about faith. What if I truly believed in every fiber of my being that God loved me? What if I could truly lay all my burdens at His feet? What if I trusted Him with all of who I am? What if I responded to those "flashes" of ideas? How would it change my live and the lives of those around me?
Ifspeak. I wonder if it is a language I can relearn . . . .
Sometimes hope is so close we might reach out and touch it if we dare and be changed forever in taking that action. 
Have you ever noticed that a candle in the light doesn't mean much? That is to say, its impact isn't felt. A candle in the dark -- now that is another story. Its light draw's our attention as it pushes back the darkness that surrounds it. Hope is always useful. But it is when the darkness is pressing in, that it is most useful.
But then, maybe those who have not learned to hope in the day cannot fathom it in the darkness? Perhaps, it is all the hopes that we see come to fruition in the light of day that make hope in the night possible.
I have always been fascinated by World War II history. I have wondered if I would have had the courage to hide my neighbors . . .. Would I risk my life for another?
Corrie ten Boom is the author of The Hiding Place. It is the story of her family during WWII and how they helped rescue Jews in Holland. In the course of hiding refugees, the family was found out. Corrie, Betsie (her sister), and their father were sent to concentration camps. Their father died within 10 days. Betsie also later died in the camp.
One conversation that Corrie writes about in the The Hiding Place stands out to me in particular. Somehow, Betsie and Corrie were able to smuggle a Bible into the camp when they were arrested. One night they are lying on the bunks being bitten by fleas. Corrie complains to Betsie about the fleas. Betsie tells Corrie that they must pray and thank God for the fleas. Her reasoning -- the guards do not come into their barracks because of the fleas. As a result, they are able to have their Bible and even does a Bible study with the other women.
Hope, seeing God in even the "small things," I think is what made Betsie able to thank God even for the fleas. She recognized that no detail was ever out of His hand. It was her life long history with God that enabled her to connect the dots to Him even in the midst of the horror of a camp.
So, how do we learn to hope in the day so that when we are in darkness we can hope again?
Recount God's faithfulness to you. Sometimes, when things are hard it's difficult to see all the ways He has been faithful. I did a little of that with recounting blessings in Friday’s post.
Tonight I was looking back even further. I grew up in a nominally Christian home. We generally went to church on Christmas and Easter and a few other times scattered among the year. As I look back, it is amazing to me that we just happened to go to church the Sunday they were giving the third grader's Bibles. Honestly, I had never read any of the Bible or even looked at one. I don't remember there being one in the house. But God knew that if He got a Bible into my hands I would read it. (Of course, it didn't hurt that I had a little competition going with my twin as to who could read the whole thing first. So periodically, we would ask, "So where are you?" This would set about a flurry of reading.)
God also put me in a family that was very BIG on appearances. It was important to my parents that we belong to the church. In our denomination, we had to be confirmed. This happened in the 7th grad and necessitated being in church for a year for confirmation classes. My parents decided that they would take us and drop us off. I don't remember being particularly thrilled the first week, but we soon discovered we liked it and were voluntarily going to youth group and choir as well! Within a year, I had made a personal decision for Christ.
When I reflect on all of this -- the Bible Sunday and having to go to confirmation class -- I see God's hand at work. He was preparing my heart for the day I would meet Him years before it happened. So, when the darkness pushes in, I can recount the way He was faithful in bringing me to himself and all the ways He's been faithful ever since.
How have you seen God's faithfulness?
Hi to anyone who stopped over regarding my question on Lysa's blog -- http://www.lysaterkeurst.blogspot.com/ (If you didn't come from there you should stop in. It is really interesting and fun.) I asked the question in the comment section: Which country occupied by Germany during WWII save the majority of it's Jewish population (about 90%)?
The answer is Denmark! We don't hear about that all that much, but it is a great story. They were occupied and the Danish government learned about the impending roundup of it's Jewish citizens about 3 weeks before it was scheduled. They placed smuggled them out in false bottoms in fishing boats and saved about 3,000 lives. I think that is amazing!
I also think it a story of faith and hope. Denmark was an occupied nation and those involved risked much to smuggle their friends and neighbors and strangers to safety. They put faith into action. I also think they put hope into action. Without hope of success, they would have ignored the problem and many innocent lives would have been lost.
Hope -- it is reaching and reaching and reaching. It is action in the midst of adversity and going against the odds because we know the One who holds us in the palm of his hand.
